I didn’t know the path my life would take after being injured in the military in 2001. Life became depressing and pointless when my list of injuries and disabilities continued to grow, including a head injury, incomplete spinal cord injury, partial paralysis, drop foot, and much more. It wasn’t until five years after being injured and told I would sit in a chair for the rest of my life on medication that I decided that would not be my life.
Fast forward nineteen years after my decision to live my best life and I found myself enjoying our time at Disney World with my daughter. Keeping up with my daughter on a daily basis requires a whole lot of training, which doesn’t stop because I’m on vacation. At Disney World, I would rise early to train at the resort gym, before my daughter woke up. Then we would enjoy the animals just off our balcony at the Jambo House, thanks to my friend Bryan’s timeshare. Soon after breakfast, we were on our way to one of the Disney parks for the morning and then we’d spend the afternoon playing in the resort pool.
This much activity with my daughter wouldn’t be possible without a life dedicated to training and strengthening my body and mind, or without my Allard AFO’s: ToeOFFs® and BlueROCKERs®, which help propel me forward along my journey in life.
Every day greets me with pain and immobility. Some days I struggle to meet this challenge. In the past, most days I failed, and would try and hide from the challenge with television, video games, food, pain medication, alcohol, and excuses on why it is okay for me to take it easy, to occupy my mind and escape the pain, and/or find a way to avoid life.
I don’t hide or escape anymore. I meet most days with a positive attitude and challenge myself to see what new heights I can reach or ceilings I can break through. Even though I meet each day craving more in life, fear lingers in my mind. I fear not accomplishing my goals, I fear my body failing, I fear my mind failing, and most of all I fear my mind failing my body. These fears are amplified when with my daughter and especially when traveling with my daughter. Having a low mental and/or physical functioning day is not an option.
I have found that for me to overcome these fears, cast them from my mind, and be able to move forward, I must believe I can. This belief does not come easy, and it does not come without extreme hard work mentally and physically. Pushing myself daily through mental tasks and gaining knowledge, and pushing my body to the point of breaking and beyond, forges my mind into a tool that drives my body forward no matter what obstacles or challenges it faces.
I would not be standing with my daughter posing for pictures at Disney World without meeting each day and each challenge, mental and physical, with a “how to I overcome this” attitude, instead of the “what’s the point.”
The “what’s the point” thoughts are always there with solutions for the pain and immobility, which can include pain medication, a large Coke, large fry, Big Mac, vanilla shake, bags of chips, or any kind of junk food, and begging me to enjoy binge eating, while binge watching television and playing video games. These thoughts no longer win.
I win each moment of each day!
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